And the earth was a formless and desolate emptiness, and darkness was over the surface of the deep … Then God said, ‘Let there be light’; and there was light.”
~ Genesis 1:2-3, NASB ~

The beginning of genuine Christian discipleship and recovery is not a desire to be better; it is the admission of total ruin. One that comes by way of godly sorrow and contrition of spirit. A deep brokenness of human will, mind, and spirit. We come to ask God – come asking, begging, Him to help us tidy up the ruin of our lives, to help us organize the chaos into something manageable. For His grace to help us manage and cope, or deal, with the ruins of our lives.

God is not interested in helping us to either cope, manage, or deal with how we’ve shipwrecked our lives. He desires, and intends, to create something entirely new out of the void we find ourselves in. Each of us needs to come to the place of spiritual depravity. A place of spiritual bondage and desolation. A place where we awaken to the awful state of our own conditions – our own powerless and inability to manage our lives. It is this “formless and desolate emptiness” of our own soul and admit that we are powerless to light a fire that purges and cleanses us.

As long as you believe you have a spark of your own life left to fan into flame, you are not ready for God’s creative power to work in your heart, mind, and spirit. The darkness over the surface of the deep is not a problem for us to solve through our own willpower; it is a condition that can only be broken by the invading voice of God – the very spirit of Truth.

The Spirit of God was “hovering,” waiting. He waits over the chaos of your addiction, your broken promises, and your moral bankruptcy. He does not panic at the sight of your desolation. He will not act until you stop attempting to be the creator of your own restoration.

Recovery is not renovation of our lives. Nor is it a reformation of our lives. It is not a renovation or reformation project we undertake. Recovery is a resurrection of the corruptible and desolate soul that needs to be put to death and buried in covenant with Christ. Only then are we risen up in a newness of life through Christ. We are to stop attempting to explain the darkness or negotiate with the chaos. Stand still in the midst of your absolute ability and allow the Father, through Christ, by the gift and power of the Holy Spirit, to speak the very word that separates who you were from who He is making you. Let Him command the light you need to separate from the darkness and step into His glory.