Tonight’s writing session brought a major milestone: I’m officially halfway through Chapter Twelve of the revised and expanded edition of Mourning Ellyn. This rewrite has become far more than a simple polish — it’s a full emotional and structural transformation of the original 2006 manuscript. The story is not just evolving; it is expanding into new dimensions that I had not anticipated during the initial drafting process.

As I dive deeper into the narrative, I find that the characters are developing in unexpected ways, revealing complexities that enrich their journeys and intensify the emotional core of the tale. Each rewritten page brings a greater sense of cohesion to the plot, allowing the themes of love, loss, and redemption to resonate more profoundly with readers. What began as a personal recounting of grief has now transcended into a richer tapestry, beautifully intertwining elements of paranormal romance with the weight of supernatural tragedy that I always envisioned for this story.

Additionally, I’ve been incorporating and refining the pacing and character arcs, ensuring that each moment feels purposeful and engaging. I’ve taken the time to explore backstories and motivations that were previously untapped, resulting in a narrative that feels both complete and ready to captivate a broader audience.

Below is a snapshot of the journey so far, reflecting on the significant changes and the emotional depth I’ve strived to achieve throughout this process. Each milestone in this creative endeavor marks a step closer to honoring the essence of Mourning Ellyn as it was meant to be, a story filled with heart and supernatural intrigue.

✨ Chapter‑by‑Chapter Progress Overview

Chapters 1–3: Foundations & Foreshadowing

• Rebuilt character introductions with stronger emotional grounding.
• Established Jaymes and Ellyn’s relationship with more nuance and tenderness.
• Planted early supernatural cues that now pay off later in the story.
• Corrected pacing issues and clarified motivations.

Chapter 4: The Death Scene

• Completely rewritten into a cinematic, visceral sequence.
• Added Ellyn’s POV as she slips between life and death.
• Introduced the golden‑light threshold and the first hint of her tether.
• Moved the pregnancy reveal to maximize emotional impact.

Chapter 5: The Waiting Room

• Deepened the grief triad: Jaymes, Chandler, and Desiree.
• Clarified the emotional fractures between the siblings.
• Showed Ellyn’s first attempts to remain close to Jaymes.
• Introduced the “lingering dead” concept organically.

Chapter 6: The Chapel Scene

• Elevated into its own standalone chapter.
• Jaymes’ spiritual collapse is now raw and honest.
• The chaplain senses Ellyn’s presence, adding subtle worldbuilding.
• Ellyn chooses to stay — the moment her tether becomes intentional.

Chapter 7: The First Night Without Her

• Jaymes’ emotional unraveling begins.
• Ellyn follows him home, marking the start of the haunting arc.
• Soft rules of her presence begin to take shape.

Chapters 8–11: Rising Tension & Character Expansion

• Strengthened Chandler’s role as emotional anchor and future protagonist.
• Expanded Desiree’s internal conflict and jealousy, planting seeds for future revelations.
• Introduced Shania Savage’s cultural “knowing” and her ability to sense Ellyn.
• Smoothed out plot holes and tightened continuity.

Chapter 12 (In Progress): The Recognition

• Shania openly acknowledges Ellyn’s presence.
• Introduced the Salish‑rooted term sxʷúyət — a spirit‑presence tethered by love.
• Deepened the paranormal romance arc between Jaymes and Ellyn.
• Strengthened the emotional stakes for the chapters ahead.

🌙 Character Sketches (Updated)

Ellyn

A spirit caught between worlds — not lost, not wandering, but tethered by love, grief, and unfinished purpose. She drifts through the shadows, lingering in the spaces where memories are woven, feeling the weight of the emotions that bind her to the living realm. Her POV now adds emotional clarity and supernatural intimacy, allowing those who glimpse her essence to sense the depth of her longing. Every whisper of the wind carries her unspoken words, and every flicker of light ignites a connection to the past she cannot fully leave behind. In this delicate balance of existence, she becomes a guardian of the stories she once lived, bridging the gap between life and the afterlife, forever yearning for resolution.

Jaymes

A man unraveling under the weight of loss, guilt, and the ghost he can’t see but feels everywhere, drifts through life in a haze of melancholy. Each step he takes is burdened by memories of what once was, lingering like shadows that refuse to fade. The whispers of past mistakes echo in his mind, amplifying his sorrow and amplifying the torment of his soul. His arc is now layered, tragic, and deeply human, reflecting the struggles that define not just his existence but the essence of his humanity. In moments of solitude, he grapples with the spectral presence of regret, confronting his unresolved feelings that claw at his peace of mind and haunt his every waking moment.

Shania Savage

A mixed‑heritage woman whose Coast Salish roots give her a quiet spiritual intuition, she embodies a deep connection to her ancestry and the stories that have been passed down through generations. As she navigates her own identity, she draws from this well of cultural wisdom, which enriches her understanding of the world around her. In a transformative moment, she becomes the first living person to truly see Ellyn, a unique experience that bridges the gap between the material and the ethereal, grounding the supernatural in cultural authenticity. This profound encounter not only alters her perception of reality but also invites others to recognize the importance of heritage in shaping their own spiritual journeys.

Camus Chandler

Steady, observant, and quietly grieving, he carries the weight of his past while navigating the complexities of his new reality. Each day, the intricacies of his expanded role lay the emotional groundwork for a profound transformation that will ultimately shape his identity. In the journey toward becoming Copper Steele in Don’t Kiss Me Goodbye, he confronts not only his personal demons but also the external challenges that test his resilience and determination. Through subtle interactions and contemplative moments, he begins to unravel the layers of his character, paving the way for a powerful evolution that resonates deeply with both the struggles and triumphs of the human spirit.

Desiree

Complex, wounded, and carrying a long-buried jealousy toward her sister, she navigates the emotional turmoil that has shaped her life. This jealousy, rooted in childhood experiences and family dynamics, has festered over the years, subtly influencing her relationships and self-perception. Her emotional arc now casts subtle shadows that will echo into Chasing Dakota, revealing the intricate layers of her character and the unresolved issues that continue to haunt her. As she confronts these deep-seated feelings, the journey she embarks on will not only challenge her sense of identity but also invite readers to explore the delicate balance between love and rivalry in familial bonds.

Today’s Excerpt (Chapter Eleven)

The second hand on Jaymes’s watch didn’t just move; it stuttered, a jagged rhythmic scraping that seemed to sync with the frantic thrumming in his chest. Every tick was a reminder of the time he no longer had, of the seconds ticking away from the last time he’d seen her alive. The air in the efficiency apartment had grown thick—stale with the ghosts of old coffee and the heavy, unwashed scent of a man’s grief.

“I… I’m sorry,” Jaymes rasped, his voice sounding like dry leaves skittering across pavement. “Can you… just tell Chandler I needed air? I need to clear my head.”

He didn’t wait for an answer. He grabbed his cup, his knuckles white as he gripped the cardboard, and slipped out the door before the walls could finish closing in.

Ellyn lunged after him, her hand outstretched. Jay, wait! She reached for the sleeve of the hoodie, desperate to anchor him to the room, to the safety of Shania’s steady fire. But her fingers passed through him like woodsmoke through a screen door. He didn’t even shiver. He just drifted away, a shadow dissolving into the gray light of the hallway.

She stood at the closed door, her heart twisting with a phantom ache that felt more real than the floor beneath her feet. She turned back to the room, her spirit vibrating with the silent scream of the unheard—

And stopped dead.

Shania wasn’t looking at the door. She wasn’t looking at the case file. She was staring directly at Ellyn.

Her midnight-blue eyes weren’t searching; they were settled. They held a weight, an ancient, quiet stillness that didn’t belong in a messy Tumwater studio.

“You know,” Shania said, her voice a low, melodic vibration that seemed to bypass Ellyn’s ears and resonate directly in her core. “You don’t have to hide. Not from me.”

Ellyn froze, her translucent form flickering like a dying candle.

Shania didn’t reach for her service weapon or gasp in terror. She simply picked up a dish towel and began to wipe her hands, her movements slow and deliberate. “My mother’s people… the Coast Salish… they have names for this. They don’t see death as a wall, but as a cedar curtain. Sometimes, the wind blows it just enough that we see who’s standing on the other side.”

She stepped closer, the scent of her—cedarwood and iron—mixing with the faint, spectral orange blossom that followed Ellyn.

“Most folks look at the red hair and the freckles and see the Irish side,” Shania said, a wry, fleeting smile touching her lips. “My dad’s genes were loud. They won the physical fight. But my mom’s people? The People of the Water?” She tapped the center of her chest, right over her heart. “That’s where the knowing lives.”

Her eyes lifted, steady and unafraid.

“I felt you the moment you crossed the threshold at Georgia’s. You aren’t a ghost, Ellyn. You’re what my mom called a sxʷúyət—a spirit‑presence tethered by a love that hasn’t finished its work yet.”

Shania’s gaze softened, drifting somewhere far beyond the room.

“My mom used to tell me stories when I was little,” she said quietly. “We’d sit on the old cedar dock behind my grandmother’s house. The water was always cold, always moving. She’d point to the ripples and say, ‘Watch how the world remembers us. Even after we move on, something stays.’”

Ellyn felt the words settle over her like a warm hand.

Shania continued, “One night, I asked her why I sometimes felt someone standing behind me when no one was there. She smiled and said it was a sxʷúyət (s-hwoo-yut) —a spirit‑presence. Not frightening. Not lost. Just… someone whose love hadn’t finished its work.” She tapped her chest again. “She said only certain people feel them. People who listen with more than their ears.”

Ellyn’s throat tightened. “I didn’t know anyone could sense me.”

“I can,” Shania said. “And I can feel why you’re here.”

Ellyn’s voice trembled. “Jaymes.”

Shania nodded. “He’s breaking in ways he won’t let anyone see. You’re holding the pieces together.”

Ellyn closed her eyes, overwhelmed by the truth of it. “I’m trying.”

“And you are,” Shania whispered. “More than you know.”

Ellyn felt the words rather than heard them. They felt like a warm tide washing over her cold edges. “You… you see me? Truly?”

“Clear as the Sound after a storm,” Shania whispered. Her eyes shimmered with a profound, ancestral reverence. “I see the light you’re trying to cast on him. And I see why you’re staying. Jaymes is walking through the Big Dark right now. He thinks he’s alone in the woods, but you’re the fire he’s carrying, even if he can’t feel the heat yet.”

Ellyn’s shoulders slumped, her form softening. “He’s hurting so much. I try to touch him, to tell him about Gabriella, but I’m just… I’m just mist.”

“Then be the mist,” Shania said, her voice a command and a prayer. “Be the mist that guides him away from the cliff. In my mother’s stories, the ancestors stay close until the living find their feet on the path again. Just… don’t let your light burn out in his shadow. You have to keep enough of yourself to find your own way home when the time comes.”

🔥 Spoiler: The Chandler/Copper Steele Connection

For those who’ve followed my work across multiple projects, Mourning Ellyn now officially serves as the origin story for Camus Chandler — the man who will eventually become Copper Steele in Don’t Kiss Me Goodbye.

This rewrite strengthens that transformation by delving deeper into Camus’s psyche, exploring his vulnerabilities and motivations more intricately. By providing vivid backstories for significant characters, the narrative complexity is enhanced, elucidating the emotional landscape that shapes Camus into Copper.

The relationships he builds, the challenges he faces, and the choices he makes are all intricately woven together, creating a tapestry that not only defines him but also foreshadows his evolution. Additionally, this version integrates a series of pivotal moments that act as catalysts for his character development, allowing readers to witness the gradual metamorphosis from a seemingly ordinary man to a complex, layered hero.

Moreover, the polished prose aims to create a more immersive experience, drawing readers into the distinct, often turbulent world that surrounds Camus. This approach amplifies the stakes involved in his journey, making each decision feel consequential and each relationship vital. As a result, readers will find themselves eagerly anticipating the moment he fully steps into the shoes of Copper Steele, ready to embrace the challenges that await him in Don’t Kiss Me Goodbye.

• showing Chandler’s early emotional wounds
• revealing the cracks in his identity long before he reinvents himself
• deepening his bond with Jaymes
• establishing Shania as a key figure in his life
• planting the seeds of the trauma that will eventually push him out of Seattle

His arc in Mourning Ellyn is no longer a side note — it’s the first step in a much larger journey.